Monday, November 06, 2006

And next?

Ok now where were we? So my plan was to visit the sacred Goddess sites of the UK – in a pilgrimage in celebration of my initiation as a witch. There was just one problem, being blind, the idea of solo pilgrimages, whilst an adventure, was beginning to feel more and more scary!

I asked friends for recommendations. I particularly wanted to go to Cornwall, the country of some of my ancestors.

A friend suggested heading for the Toe of Cornwall and checking out the Merry Maidens stone circle, the Men-an-Tol (the standing stone construction of which the centre stone is a circle, like a standing-on-end hoop that a thin enough person can crawl through), and Madron well, the sacred well just north of Penzance. Someone also mentioned fugous, which are sites where you somehow crawl underground which also sounded intriguing.

Of course the usual other main sites were also mentioned and they all sounded tempting and yet somehow I just didn’t do anything with the information. I guess I was just not feeling up to heading out into the unknown by myself, landing up at some quiet B and B and then striking off across the hills all hope shining and white cane a-waving. There has to be a balance between adventure and trial and safety and possibility. I just couldn’t find it yet.

I talked to friends who lived in places where there were sacred sites. This with a view to staying with them and then marching across the hills all by myself. And yet, I still did not act.

And if I was anxious about the wild blue yonder, perhaps I could pilgrimage at first to sacred pagan sites in London. There was less likelihood of having to yomp across a bare hillside – although trying to find Boadicea’s mount on Hampstead Heath might be a challenge in itself – let alone clambering over the railings to get to it.

I fantasised about whether it would be possible if I had a large ball of string and a compass or horror of horrors (for I am *not* a dog gal) a helpful guide dog even. I had recently been exercising my mind on just how a blind pagan could spend time in nature without the assistance of the two or four footed variety. I confess that I had speculated on whether having a dog would help me meet the Goddess in some of London’s many green spaces that I found so hard to go to independently. But then I came to my senses and remembered that dogs come with large licking tongues which don’t seem to mind what they lick and lovely doggy breath which they like to greet you with first thing in the morning, and I thought better of it.

Sooo, I set my trusty Virtual Assistant onto the case and began to find out about pagan sites in London.

There are sites of many sacred wells, a number of promising mounts, the remains of some standing stones, and some interesting trees of an ancient kind, the glorious great River Thames and a whole heap of history. And still I did nothing!

Finally, it came to me that I was scared – and reasonably so perhaps you might say. I just couldn’t’ think of a way to do it.

I had to face it; this solo pilgrimage lark wasn’t going to happen in the truly solo sense. Then a friend said: “think of all this as an extended honeymoon with the goddess.” And I thought “yes”” I don’t need to be alone because She will be with me all the time. And you know, I expect She won’t mind in the least that I bring someone along with me, as long as the special time I spend with Her, I can give Her all my attention. So could I organise my support so that I can have that time alone with the Goddess – even if physically my helper is right there next to me? Of course! This is the way to do it. I could still pilgrimage in an accessible way and it would be as powerful!

And then I realised that it was soon going to be my birthday. My best mate had announced that she was going to spend it somewhere else and I had thrown a strop! Tempting though it was to slam the door and go to bed for a few days, grumbling about how no-one loves me (sniff), I thought, bugger it –I’ll go off to Devon and stay with a mate. I’ll hire a p.a. and go and do all the goddess sites on the North Devon coast, whatever I can find on the moors and anything else that takes my fancy.

And so that’s what I am going to do. I have precisely two days in which to prepare. I have to sort my Goddess honeymoon trousseau - (ritual tools, robes, wellies, waterproof cloaks and umbrellas, not to mention walking sticks, thermal vests and hot water bottles), prepare the rituals I will perform and much more. So, the honeymoon is about to begin!!!

A very excited blackbird Owl

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